Why 'Mum Guilt' Is The Worst

After one of my previous posts about some of the realities of being a parent, it seems quite a few of my readers have felt the same 'mum guilt' that I'd mentioned that creeps in when it comes to parenting. So, I thought I'd write a post about it!

We all want the best for our babies

This is the overall reason why mum guilt makes life harder. We all want to be making the best decisions for our children, because that's what parents do. We have to bear the burden of making sure that everything is ok, and that our babies are being well looked after and loved. Most of the time, at the expense of our own sanity!

We shouldn't feel guilty for wanting a break

We are only human.

If I was working, I'd have a lunch break to collect myself a little bit (although, most likely, still missing my baby) but a break nonetheless. However, as a stay at home parent, it feels like I'm constantly on the go. Sure, I squeeze a shower in when Edith is asleep in the mornings, and I manage to sort my hair and face out, but I'm constantly preparing for her to wake up and begin our day, as well as planning something for us to do.

Baby-free time?!

I recently had baby-free time, and I missed Edith. I missed being on the go, and I felt somewhat guilty for doing something without her. Almost as if I had abandoned her, which I totally didn't because she was with her daddy. However, it made me feel guilty thinking 'what if she thinks I don't want to spend time with her' which is absurd even just typing it out on this blog. Edith had a great time. She loved spending time with just her daddy, and was involving him in her play when we had arrived home. She doesn't often get to see him for a long periods of time as he's at work, so I think she really enjoyed her time with him.

I know, it was good for me to have a couple of hours to myself, and I really did enjoy my break because it involved a catch up and cake (cake helps mum-guilt - I can confirm!). It just felt somewhat alien to not have a changing bag with me, or constantly be checking on Edith's needs.

Possibly the best cupcake that I have ever eaten!

Self-care is important

There is nothing wrong with looking after yourself. I recently saw a post on Facebook, which bashed mums who do things for themselves, such as doing their make up or nails, and claimed that they didn't love their children as much or weren't as real as parents who do not do those things. That blew my mind. There is nothing wrong with taking the time to do something for yourself, and it doesn't make you a bad parent for doing so. It doesn't mean you don't love your children. We live in a society that constantly thinks there is a right or wrong way to do anything, which I think contributes massively to mum guilt. Aside from worrying about your child, you worry about how society perceives you as a parent, when other peoples opinions really don't count.

Do you ever feel mum guilt?

Thanks, lovelies.


No comments