Becoming Mumsy

My journey through motherhood and everything in between.

Couple-cramming time?

This post is a vent filled one, so bear with!
I wanted to make this post to focus on one main piece of advice that seems to given to Max and I, with regards to becoming a family of three.

Advice

I seem to be getting a lot of advice, particularly now that I'm in the later part of pregnancy and how we should be making time for each other now, as if we didn't do that before. Although meaning well, it seems like a strange piece of advice to be offered, especially when we wanted nothing more than to become parents and to start our family. 

We have always made sure that we make time for one-another, and that certainly hasn't stopped since me being pregnant. If anything, I've been much more clingy, and in need of more attention (sorry Max!), which has resulted in poor hubby having to give up his 'computer nights' to be with me. Although, on the whole, I'm sure he doesn't mind, but I know he would probably appreciate some more time to himself. Which leads me to question, surely we should be doing things that we wanted to do as individuals, and not just as a couple? And what does 'making the most of it' really mean?

Does relaxing at home count as 'making the most of it'?


Pressure?

Referring back to the advice of making time for each other, it does feel like a sense of pressure being added to me, in particular. I am currently in my 36th week of pregnancy. I feel much heavier than normal, and my balance, and walking ability, is rubbish. Getting through the day is certainly becoming harder than it was a good few weeks ago, which begs the question - why on earth would I want to be out and about, doing this, that and the other? However, it does make me feel like I should be doing more, and I should be making the most of my time before our bundle makes her grand entrance.

Confessions...

I have to confess, we did have a 'Babymoon' booked for the end of January. I did end up cancelling, after we got back from Disneyland Paris, as I just knew that I wouldn't be able to face walking around and exploring somewhere new. This was much to the dismay of Max (again, I'm sorry!). Ultimately, being pregnant, as much as I have loved it, is still hard work and is physically exhausting. This, in particular, is what lead me to make the decision to cancel, as I knew I'd be uncomfortable and would probably end up ruining our time there. 

Family time...

It's all well and good suggesting that, as a couple, we should be doing more, but should we not be looking forward to the prospect of family days out, instead? After all, we should be encouraging parents-to-be to embrace the reality of what's to come in their new life. New parents shouldn't be scared into thinking that they will lose all sense of identify, that they once had before they had a baby.

I know, on the whole, people mean well when they give advice, but it almost seems that they enjoy having a sense of superiority, because they have 'been there and done it'. Perhaps it's just me and my crazy hormones?!

Thoughts?

I do feel like this was a moany post, but I'm sure there are many other people out there that possibly feel, or felt, the same. I don't know. Drop me a comment, or a message, and let me know your thoughts! Is too much pressure being put on couples? Who knows!

Thanks, lovelies.

A.x


1 comment

  1. I always thought myself and husband had a great relationship pre baby and was shocked that parenthood made us just parents (as daft as that sounds). I love being a mum but we got into a rut of being mum and dad and nothing else and I for a while didn't feel like me. We are an amazing team as parents but could go days without speaking about anything other than the baby or thinking about ourselves let alone each other. However spending every waking minute together pre baby won't change the madness that's away to occur (it's the best madness) i think it's more important to make time for each other once baby is here. Let grandparents watch baby for date night, ignore house work and snuggle up to a movie when baby naps, order that pizza and save cooking time. That's when's it's important from my experience X

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